The Experience

---

By Manish PandeyNewsbeat reporter

" You picture your life with this baby And Then all of a sudden it's Taken Away from you. "

It's been almost a year since Rebecca Spence lost her baby due to a rare, serious condition called Edwards' syndrome, or trisomy 18.

Most babies diagnosed with it will sadly die before or just after being born.

Rebecca says it leaves parents with a decision - carry on, knowing The Child might not survive, or end the pregnancy.

" You have choices to make and none of them are choices you want to make, " She says.

The heart-breaking dilemma has been played out in EastEnders over The Past month.

Characters Whitney Dean and Zack Hudson learned their baby, Peach, had Edwards' syndrome.

Like Rebecca, the couple opted for a termination after being told it would limit The Baby 's lifespan.

Many other viewers said the emotional scenes reflected their own experiences, and.

'Feels like a blur'

In Rebecca's case, her 12-week pregnancy scan found no problems, but a later check showed multiple abnormalities.

She describes a feeling of " shock, disbelief And Then going into a state of fight or flight" after The Diagnosis of Edwards' syndrome.

" I was in denial for a while, " She says, " Hard to remember exactly how I was feeling. "

Levi, 28 from Stoke, was 20 weeks pregnant when problems were found and her baby was diagnosed with Edwards' syndrome.

That moment was " crazy, like The World stops, " She says.

" It's like a Lightning Strike … like The World 's just come crashing down. "

Levi and her partner eventually made the decision to go ahead with a termination.

She says it was The Most challenging moment of her experience, especially seeing Other People with healthy babies having scans at the same time.

Levi says She 's grateful for the Two Children She 'd already had, " because they've given us something to Focus On ".

Both Levi and Rebecca say they were glad EastEnders chose to run the storyline.

" There should be more awareness Out There , " says Levi.

Rebecca, who's now 29, was pleased The Show also focused on Whitney and Zack's grief after losing Peach.

" It's Coming Up to the year anniversary. And it still feels raw, even now, " She tells BBC Newsbeat.

" I think pregnancy loss and baby loss is still a huge taboo, and not really spoken about very often.

" Because when you think about our baby dying, it feels wrong. It doesn't feel like The Circle of life.

" I'm sure there's so many people Out There going through things. So hopefully it'll make them feel less alone as well. "

What is Edwards' syndrome?

Not everyone has the same experience.

The NHS says about 13% of babies with Edwards' syndrome who are born alive live past their first birthday.

Amber-Rose, now aged five, is one of them.

Mum Jennifer Holyrod tells Newsbeat She was 32 weeks pregnant when She found out Amber was " not growing The Way She should have been".

A diagnosis would not have been possible at this late stage, so, after much thought, Jennifer and her partner decided to wait.

" I think not knowing at that time, it was just praying to get to The End of your pregnancy and that everything is going to be OK, " She says.

Amber was born by Caesarean Section , weighing just 4lb (1. 8kg) and with breathing difficulties.

These improved once She was treated in the neonatal department, which provides specialist care for poorly newborns, and after Two Weeks Amber was diagnosed with Edwards' Syndrome.

Jennifer says it felt " as though Amber was written off" and there was an expectation She would not survive long-term.

She says The Next six months of medical interventions were " trauma, for her and for us as a family".

" What She went through in those few months isn't something that any child should have to go through, or any parent should have to see. "

But Amber grew, became stronger and " kept being able to fight those fights" Jennifer says.

Now Amber, who started school in September, is " a happy little girl".

There are challenges, Jennifer says, with disabilities and Amber being unable to walk or talk.

" She laughs and plays. . She does communicate in her own way. She 's smiling all The Time and her interaction with people is Something Else . "

Jennifer says She was keen to share Her Story to show " there are positive outcomes" that can take place.

" When we were at the start, all we wanted was to look for those positive stories.

" It's hard to get through Every Day without that little bit of hope. So it hopefully gives Somebody Else that little bit of hope. "

SOFT UK, a specialist support charity for those affected by Edwards' syndrome, helped EastEnders' writers to shape the storyline.

In a statement, it said: " Although the EastEnders plot is not representative of everyone's story, it does capture The Experience many families will face, and the heart-breaking decisions laid out before them. "

If you've been affected by the issues raised in this article, advice can be found via.

. `

Related Topics

Source of news: bbc.com